Unforgiveness can lead to having anger and doubt within relationships which can lead to unhealthy exchanges. When a person is wrapped up in the wrong of the past it destroys the enjoyment of the present. People who hold onto unforgiveness become depressed or anxious and these feelings lead to chaos or withdraw. Holding onto past feelings of hurt can make you feel like you lack purpose or meaning in life. Have you been living but not enjoying life? What changes would you make in your life to be happier? We also lose the ability to be connected to other people.
If you are like most people someone has hurt you by actions or words. It could be a parent who criticized you like my mother did, she called me thunder thighs or a father who told you nothing because if you had a roof over your head and food on the table that was affection. Of course, there is a variety of hurt and trauma parents may have done to their children, all of it with lasting affects if the child perceived it as negative. These wounds can have lasting feelings of anger, rage or low self-worth. Recognizing the pain instead of hiding from it allows a person to embrace peace, hope and gratitude.
When I talk with people who have taken the forgiveness journey, I ask them when did they make that choice? I hear time and time again when they got to the end of themselves. It seems from the people I talk with about their specific journeys, they always tell of how they hit a bottom and knew they could not go on any farther. They recognize something had to change and that the very thing that was weighing them down was in fact what they had to deal with in order to continue on in life.
How long will you carry the very thing that is weighing you down?