Bearing graciously with one another, and willingly forgiving each other if one has a cause for complaint against another; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so should you forgive. Beyond all these things put on and wrap yourselves in [unselfish] love, which is the prefect bond of unity [for everything is bound together in agreement when each one seeks the best for others]. (Colossians 3:13-14 AMP)

The scripture discusses moving into unselfish love for the good of all. Moving into willingly forgiving even if our hurt is just. The judgement is not ours to hold onto, it belongs to God. God has forgiven us from the wretched things we have done and in order to come into a deep relationship with him he requires us to work towards forgiveness.

As we uncover our hurt there is always the main person who we blame but if we take a closer look there are usually more people associated with the situation. As we uncover our experiences do not be surprised that there will be other people related to an experience that need to be forgiven. When we forgive all involved it brings a deeper level of healing.

The majority of people will skip this step as they will not think about the others involved in the healing process. When I was working through my forgiveness with the person who molested me, I had to think about his parents. What must have happened to this once little boy to make him do the things he did to me. I had to work through humanizing him and seeing his life. The possibly of this person being a sexually abused as a young boy is very plausible.  I had to imagine his life in order to humanize him. When I created a picture in my mind of what he must have gone through it helped me to overcome my own healing by realizing, hurt people will often hurt others.